he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Randomize
