I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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