New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
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