If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Randomize
