You just made me feel so damn special
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
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