I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I could fuck to npr.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
