She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
