I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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