My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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