I must be too annoying 4 u.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
