It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
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