Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize