I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
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