I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize