U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Randomize
