I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Randomize