school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
is wine microwaveable?
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
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