is wine microwaveable?
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize