Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
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