well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Randomize
