Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
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