the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
