i think my mom watched the whole time
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
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He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.