He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
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