i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
