im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
It's just like the Real World with babies
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
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