i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Quick, to the slutcave!
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
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he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
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IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
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