No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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