It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
You ate ashes out of my bong
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
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