great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
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All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
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my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird