The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
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