You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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