Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Watching her eat just hurts me
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
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