Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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