"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, be my cock's hype man.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Randomize