Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
