He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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