if only i could text you this smell
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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