Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
