I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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