bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
I am midnight drunk by noon
mondays should just be called national damage control day
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
