we're blogging at a bar
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
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