What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
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