My hair reeks of homosexuality.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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