Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Randomize
