Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Randomize
