why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
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I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
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Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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