There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
