Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
