Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
