Don't EVER smell your tampon
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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