Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
He shit in the fireplace
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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