my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize