I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize