I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
nutella sex= disaster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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